No Buko, No Pie


Category Archive

The following is a list of all entries from the boredom category.

Relationship Advice for my Guy Friends

My Facebook status at 11:45pm:

Nabo-bore ako. Magtanong naman kayo sa akin ng problema sa relationship. Di ko nga lang pinapangako ang matinong payo…

P.S.
Pwede ring hindi matino ang tanong nyo.

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Maybe I was just really sleep-deprived at this point…so were my guy friends,

 

Doc mahal kaya niya ako? Hahaha – Cocoy

Cocoy,

1. Is she real?

2. Does she know you exist?

3. Nag-uusap kayo?

Kung ang sagot sa tatlo ay yes, then may posibilidad na mahal ka nya kung hindi pa. Ang payo ko sa ‘yo: kumuha ka ng sample ng buhok nya (masipag ka naman e) at ilagay sa ilalim ng unan mo para mapanaginipan ka nya. Pag gising nya, mahal ka na nya. Works 8 out of 10 times.

 

Doc, saan ba nakakabili ng washing machine na pambabae lang? Sawang sawa na ako maglaba ng damit naming mag asawa eh. – Geoff

Geoff, it does not exist. Pang-lalake lang talaga. Pero parang hindi ito pang-relationship advice. BUT dahil kaibigan kita, ito ang payo ko: bigyan mo sya ng isang dosenang brand new hangers. Tapos lagyan mo ng message na “I MISS HANGING OUT WITH YOU.”

Di ka man makakuha ng washing machine na pang-babae, sabay naman kayong maglalaba. Sorry, maglalaba ka pa rin. Works 9 out of 10 times.

 

May problema ako sa relationship ko sa bacon, pano ko sya ititigil? Nasisira na diet ko… – Pao

Maging ako ay ganyan. May bagong sundae sa Mc Donald’s na kahit isang buwan kong binabalikbalikan ay di ko pa rin matandaan ang pangalan. Parang choco dipped sundae na oreo-filled. Kung di ko maalala ang pangalan pero binabalikan ko sya kahit pasado hatinggabi, then it must be true love.

So don’t let that bacon go. True love happens once in a lifetime, but bacon can happen 3 times a day. Or even more. Then it must be greater than true love.

…oh, and bacon will stay in your heart forever.

 

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Day 8: Pseudo-vertigo

I am drinking for the sole purpose of feeling how it is again to need an assistance to ambulate, or that I have to prop myself up against the wall and railings as I ascend to my bedroom because I have no sense of muscle coordination. I am curious how it is like again to be in a state of pseudo-vertigo where everything around me is constantly swirling. And I find it amusing how it’s like to once more convince those around you repeatedly that you are still fine, all the while doing your best to keep your head off the table because it suddenly had a tremendous affinity for the floor.

I swear, that’s my main goal – to be heavily inebriated just to recall how it feels.

However, those who know what I’m going through were concerned that I am drowning myself in alcohol while wallowing in self-pity or in misery. While that may be subliminally true, I am consciously diverting my thoughts away from the source of my dreariness. I am not the one who can solve this current predicament, and it also takes time to make itself clearer. Thinking about it and torturing myself by celebrating the confusion and heartache it has caused will not solve anything.

 

Having put aside those thoughts gave room for new ones – for serious thoughts, for happy thoughts, and new ideas that can inject some enthusiasm in my every day. And these are things I desperately need because having succumbed to melancholy has pulled me down and kept me out of focus.

I am determined to find my old self back.

***

I have already downed 1 vodka ice cruiser and I thought misery loves company. If I can’t be happy, no one can be. I mean it. But as I dissect this thought, I realized this is only applicable to two people playing tango with my life.

I could continue being miserable, but I would only be digging deeper into a pool of  agony. Would I rather drown there or in a renowned amusement with the aftermath of alcohol?

You obviously figured out what I chose.

After a few raunchy episodes of Californication and at the end of my third bottle, I was in that limbo between the outposts of sobriety and possibly the first stages of mild intoxication – none of the physiological responses that I was looking forward to. At the end of that third bottle, gastritis kicked in and knocked me off the mild intoxication I was trying to penetrate.

So much for getting delirious. Epic fail.


I wish it were a sunny day.

It’s been a while since I’ve done this because a lot has happened – I’ve been up, I’ve been on a career and personal high, I got my personal lows, and I’m reaching a new high career again.

This is not to say that a supposed new career high isn’t without any headache. I have a major headache and it isn’t easy. My other responsibilities are being compromised that I’m beginning to hate myself. I know I need a breather. I just wanna pause this moment, transport myself in another dimension and have a vacation, then return to un-pause when I’m psyched. Sadly, reality will not permit.

But who’s stopping you from imagining a day in your espadrilles and shorts, enjoying the warm sunny day when the reality is it’s gloomy outside with the occasional rain?

Plus, it’s a Saturday and there are Pinoy bands and a French band playing at The Fort… Gotta go while it’s still a weekend. At least I have that.


My Pseudo-Rainy Day

This blog fell on April 2009, and somehow managed to evade getting posted.

It’s 6:30 in the morning on a Friday. I haven’t opened the door nor drew open the blinds, but I think it’s sunny outside because there’s no sign of rain nor any cold draft in my room. Yet somehow, I suddenly felt drawn back to some few years ago when I was a medical student staying in my room on a rainy night with my computer open with books and transcripts scattered around my room and R&B blasting through my speakers.

I think the latter part (on the computer, books, papers and music) is the only thing that ties the present to the past. And I only have this TV show to thank (blame) for these reference materials and paperworks that I am once again linked to my past.

I realized how much of my focus I’ve lost from the lack of practice of reading those mega-thick medical books. I find myself reading 2 or 3 paragraphs and my mind would wander. My attention span usually ran longer than that. And along with it, I would find myself thinking back to my 23-year-old self with no knowledge on the intricasies of the medical practice…

…particularly that part of the clinical culture called tsismis and shallow supposedly-professional medical people.

I’d rather go back to that time when I had my nose in my books (and that wasn’t all the time), my room was a mess with all the reading materials I had to go through, my brain overused and out of ideas for how to name my tables and figures, the panic with trying to accomplish everything on time, and my body emanciated because I forget meal times.

Now, I still have my nose in my books and modules, my room is a mess with all the medical records I am reviewing. I am still running out of ideas on how to name my tables and figures. I panic. I don’t eat on time because I don’t notice the time. But who would’ve thought that my weight loss from gym and wall climbing would generate a chuck-load of tsimis?

Better to be emanciated just because I forget meals.

In the meantime, lemme drown in the past though this thing called R&B which hasn’t been my staple study music in a long time…

4 days later:

I’m so stressed out that it isn’t funny anymore. My circadian rhythm has been tampered with in such major fashion that I get disoriented now.

Unfortunately, my neighbors are not around. When you need someone to talk to, they’re ironically not around?

I guess I have to content myself with sleep.


Inggitera ako.

Naiinggit ako sa TV people. Ganito kasi yon: pag doctor ka at may achievement ka, e.g. “I was the one instrumental in proving that the use of Beta-blockers is actually vital in the treatment for hypertension, contrary to what was previously theorized.” People would go, “Ah, sounds… big.” (facial experession na kunwari impressed, pero actually gusto na mag-shift sa next topic). But when you’re a TV person, any achievement, no matter how small, would always merit a response of enthusiasm 100x more than that. Case in point: “I work for Survivor.” And people would go, “WOW!!! TALAGA? TUMIRA KA DON?….” (with matching nanlalaki ang mata at pamimilipit na parang akala mo ihing-ihi tapos sunod-sunod na ang tanong, kwento, at assessment nila of the game.) Gusto ko ng mga ganung achievement – yung nato-touch mo yung lives nila ng bonggang-bongga. Sure, pag doktor ka, nanggagamot ka and you save lives. Pero iba yung alam ng madlang bayan yung ginawa mo at affected sila.

Naiinggit ako sa counterpart kong doktor sa international productions ng Survivor na nagshoo-shoot sa Caramoan every year. Nakaka-5 na sya; pang-anim na nya ngayon. Nakakarami na syang experience tapos puro foreigner pa. Sobrang inggit ako. Although sabi ng bossing ko sa GMA, mas bongga daw ako… limot ko na nga lang kung bakit ako ang mas bongga. Siguro dahil alam ng ordinaryong Pilipino ang show ko at pinapanood kami; siguro dahil pati fans kilala ako 9pati ba naman sa forums, kasama ako?); siguro dahil nararanasan ko ang buhay celebrity kung kasama ko sila (kung kasama lang sila, hindi pag nag-iisa ako). Pero kahit na ba mas bongga pa ang pwesto ko, gusto ko maranasan kahit man lang isang season nila. Gusto ko maranasan paano ba ang international na production.

Naiinggit ako sa dati kong sarili na parang energizer bunny. May award pa nga ako nun e. Ngayon, sobrang tinatamad ako. 8 hours na ako kung matulog, wala pa akong naaaccomplish. Ang bagal bagal kong kumilos. Sobra akong mag-procrastinate, pati pag-gym, tinatamad ako. Pero naiinggit naman ako sa dati kong sarili na toned ang arms.

Arrrrgh. Kelangan ko nang makawala sa pagiging inggitera!


Rock!!!

When I started off with wall climbing a year ago, I kinda made a promise to myself that I would never ever climb a real rock because it’s just too darn insane for me. So I dunno what came over me a few days ago.

After my day’s lessons, my instructor and friend invited me to some hike a few kilometers from where I work. And since it was convenient, I agreed to tag along.

Then I was beginning to regret it.


Peter Pan

I am rather bored today in this hotel. What made it more difficult is that it’s boring to be on a budget. And that I’m lazy as a sloth today.

I did go out today though and walked around the neighborhood just to shake off this boredom.

For some reason, I felt like I was walking around Sesame Street. I can’t understand why. Maybe it’s the playground in the nearby park, the trees, and the pretty staircases leading up to buildings.

***

Early this evening, I watched Playhouse Disney, the History channel, and ended up watching a Filipino movie done in the 80’s.

My thoughts as a kid in the 80’s have just been validated now that I have matured –  I thought then that the way they painted sexy women was so corny and nowhere near classy! And the men were worse!  It’s not time and fashion’s fault that they forgot about these men and women; they’re just naturally style and class-challenged!

Imagine my relief that this era is over and we really are hip and cool in this generation.

Needless to say: I wasn’t able to stand it, so I switched channels and ended up watching Family Guy.

***

Ever noticed that 50-year-old people then were sooo old and that the 50-year-olds these days are younger? And I’m not just talking about appearance. People today are more vibrant and broad-minded. Madonna, Ellen de Generes and science have just proven to mankind that staying forever young is now not a fairy tale. And then there are people like me: Although I’m without child and nowhere near 40, I’m watching Playhouse Disney, lazing around in a hotel and walking around Sesame Street looking at the world like a little kid.


I am more than just a doctor now. I think.

I was watching a TV show wherein this female character introduced herself as someone who works for a man in the corporate world whose job she really doesn’t understand. All she has to understand is that she has to shop for him. And she only gets called to do her job a couple of times a year only. Which brings me to this thought: what does she do in between? If I were her, I’d get a second job.

And then I thought: I’ve always found people with more than 1 job interesting – a DJ who also hosts a TV show and sidelines as a model; a musician in an orchestra who sidelines in a rock band so he can support himself through school; or a waiter who is a pizza delivery guy on weekends and who also works in security for special events. I think they’re more than interesting. I found that I look up them. I can’t do that! Or at least with the kind of work that I do, I can’t imagine myself doing that.

But then, what is this that I’m doing? I’m blogging! And then there is this project looming over my head on a website which I believe will facilitate learning for our future doctors and nurses. I believe in it so much that I’m actually finding the right people to take in on this project. If this isn’t juggling 3 jobs, then I don’t know what.

I admire people with more than 1 job because they do what they have to in order to survive. On the other hand, I do what I do because I started it and I have to see it through. The extra dough helps, of course.

But then, I also do what I do because it helps me sort through my ideas and divert my mind from from ideas that don’t matter. That’s what being less-stressed does to people like me who have been accustomed to a fast-paced life – being less physically active is a mind fuck.

Still, I prefer this than living a fast-paced life 24/7.

And then there is one more reason why I do the things that I do – because I don’t like politics.

Let’s just leave it at that for now, shall we?


I feel lazy.

Free day ko today. Dapat ang gagawin ko ay mag-gym, then mag-check ng email, then asikasuhin ang pinaplanong projects (tawagin natin silang “Ninja Project” at “O.R. Project”), then sana magbasa ng medical book.

Pero tinablan talaga ako ng katamaran today. ‘Lang ya yung ulan.

Una, dahil “late” ang gising ko sa usual 6am ko, di ako nakarating sa gym ng 7am. E ayokong pumunta doon ng 10am dahil dumadami na ang tao. Today, di ko feel ang maraming tao. Kahit pa nabawasan yan dahil umuulan, di ko feel. Period.

So, natulog ako.

Pag gising ko, naalala ko na di pa pala ako nag-breakfast. At di pa pala ako nag-grocery. So anong kinain ko? Yung vegetarian chicharon.

Now, madali lang mag-check ng email. And then, tinamad akong simulan ang projects. So chineck ko na lang ang 4 na DVD na binili ko kagabi kung may damage. And then natulog uli ako.

Pag gising ko, 2:30 pm na. At kelangan mag-lunch. Pero dahil tamad ako, nagpadeliver na lang ako ng ulam na good for 2, para sa gabi na ung isa.

At patuloy ang ulan habang kumakain ako.

Medyo tinablan ako ng kasipagan at sinimulan ko na ang O.R. Project at ang Ninja Project. Pero pagkatapos nun, at 5:30 pm, natulog na uli ako.

Pag gising ko, dinner time na. Pero anong ginawa ko? Nag-facebook. Loko.

10pm na. Survivor na.


Beautiful and Boring

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I wish I can tell you the extraordinary events that would’ve transpired in this hotel resort. I wish I can tell you  I was there when they rescued someone in a car that was hanging on a cliff one night, but that happened 2 nights before I came. If not anything medical, then I wish I could tell you that when I have quiet breakfasts and dinners while reading a book, some random pleasant stranger would come up to me, start a conversation and we would hit it off instantly. It doesn’t matter if it was a he or a she. Just an instant connection would have been enough.

Instead, I have been spending time in this beautiful resort without as much action at work or as a guest. I have been on standby here for 3 days without any patient nor victim. And yet because I am on standby, I’m not allowed to swim. I can’t sample their cocktails or hard drinks. I can’t fish. I can’t try their aqua sports. I can’t can’t can’t. And worst of all there’s no one to flirt here with.

This resort is beautiful and I have been soaking in all the beauty and all the comfort and all the pleasures. But nothing in recent days has been a source of spark. This resort has been boring.

On my first night here, I had dinner alone and with my book, just the way I like it. I had a pasta dinner and I was sitting on my favorite table facing the beach with my back turned from most of the guests in the restaurant. And then something cheesy happened: they played an instrumental version of Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas.  Niiiiice. To tune it steps 2 sigout, I went to my room and watched a DVD.

It slipped my mind that it’s almost that season. This year I would be spending Christmas with someone.  And yet I don’t feel joyous. Maybe I don’t need someone special. Maybe I just need to play. Maybe I just need to play and party with a lot of people. Maybe I just need to play a lot.

Maybe I am again reminded of that one and only time that I met someone on the beach and we hit it off perfectly. We became friends, then he became someone special, and then it ended and that was it.

Maybe with the amount of idle time, you really would have the tendency to think of a lot of things.
Maybe that’s just it.

I dunno. Maybe I am – in many ways – like this resort. (Chos!)

So I guess I better prepare myself for the long week here with medical books and stacks of DVD’s.